Tag: immigration

Immigration During Covid-19

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The long road to permanent residency

Before I even met my American husband, I already knew that the US was known as ”one of the hardest countries to immigrate to”, which didn’t make sense to me considering it’s a truly immigrant country.

I’ve heard the stories of many undocumented immigrants, hard-working people who have been living here for ages, but still didn’t have documentation to prove they were legal. I’ve heard about kids being separated at the borders, families being torn apart, and people getting deported. 

To be honest, I have never thought about moving to The States. It wasn’t until I met my now-husband, spent a fair amount of time in the US and got engaged to him, when I actually started considering migrating. The idea of being an ”immigrant” was intimidating, but none of my friends here ever made me feel like I wasn’t one of them. While I love them for it, many of them don’t know how hard it’s been for Sam and me to get settled here. For people who aren’t directly involved in it, the whole immigration process seems very abstract and complicated. Still, I’d like to point out that I am only one of the approximately 690 thousand people each year, who will obtain a green card through a family connection in the US. About 45 percent of all green card holders have obtained one through marriage. 

In this blog I’d like to shine some light on the complex immigration system by sharing my own immigration timeline. We all know 2020 was a challenging year to get anything done because of the pandemic. Especially here in the US, as it marked the end of the Trump administration which had a major impact on the immigration process. Immigration during Covid-19: How did things (not) work out for me? Find out below!

K-1 Fiancé visa

Step 1: Filing the Petition (I-129F) – 91 Days
We started this process April 16th 2019, about two months after we got engaged. Sam, the petitioner, ‘requests’ to start the fiancé visa processing by filing a petition. It’s a couple of pages long, containing mostly basis questions about our personal information, past addresses, past employers, information on our parents, that sort of thing. About a week later we received our first NOA (Notice of Action), stating that USCIS had received the petition. July 22nd our petition was approved! 

Step 2: Interview at American Consulate – 211 Days
After the petition approval, the case was forwarded to the NVC (National Visa Center), and then forwarded to the American Consulate in Amsterdam. This took about two months, and I received a letter on October 7th with instructions on the required medical exam and scheduling the interview. I needed to prepare some documents that took time, such as a Certificate of Conduct from Japan (Because I lived in Japan for over 6 months) and my birth certificate. I had my medical in the second week of November, which I did consider to be a bit invasive and very overpriced. The results weren’t in by the time I had my interview, which was November 19th, so that led to an temporal denial. The interview itself was not as hard as I expected it to be. There were a lot of very personal questions about my life and relationship, but if you have a legitimate relationship I don’t think you have anything to worry about. When the interviewer asked me ”when have you last seen your fiancé”, I answered with a smile ”Well, he is right outside”.  Even though I didn’t have anything to worry about, it is still nerve-wrecking: Some outsider is evaluating your relationship and determining whether you have a future with him or not. That feels so strange! I finally got my visa December 13th, well on time for our set wedding date. 

Adjustment of Status

Step 3: Get married and file for Adjustment of Status 
The fiancé visa lets you enter the US for the sole purpose of marrying your American spouse within a 90-day timeframe. Our wedding date was February 26th 2020, and we ended up filing the Adjustment of Status in early April. I do not recommend waiting this long to file: get it done sooner rather than later, and DO consult with a lawyer if you can. I prepared the package all by myself, and even though I was very meticulous I still missed some essential forms and rules. This ended up delaying the process till June 5th, which is our official processing date. By then, I had already been living in The States for half a year, but wasn’t any closer to having rights. Yes – you have no rights once married to your spouse. That 211 day process I described above to obtain the K-1 visa? That was ONLY to be able to legally get married to a US citizen and then apply for permanent residency based on your status as a spouse. While waiting for your Adjustment of Status, you are not able to work, not able to get a drivers license and drive, not able to open a bank account, not able to make any money, not able to travel outside of the country etc. The Adjustment of Status includes many different forms, such as an Affidavit of Support (financial sponsor), an I-131 Travel Document to be able to leave the US and be allowed back in, and the I-765 Employment Authorization Document. All I could do was wait and it felt like forever. USCIS was dealing was an insane backlog that built up during Trump’s presidency, and on top of that many USCIS employers were furloughed due to the pandemic. The waiting times kept increasing, and it took another 6 months to finally hear something.

Step 4: Biometrics Appointment at local office 
In December I received a letter stating that my biometrics appointment was scheduled for January 5th 2021. They had resumed these appointments with Covid regulations in place, but it did feel uncomfortable to have someone take my picture in close proximity, as well as touch my hand and fingers to get the fingerprints done. I was definitely feeling anxious about it. 

Step 5: Approval of Employment Authorization Document – 287 days 
March 19th, after several calls to lawyers and letters to Senators, because I honestly thought they had forgotten about my case, I woke up to an email saying my work permit was approved. The wait was over!! The relieve I felt this day was surreal. I was finally, FINALLY able to work, earn money, get a social security number, open a bank account, get an Oregon ID, get my driver’s license, look for jobs: the opportunities seemed endless!

How crazy right, things that anyone takes for granted but that were taken away from me for so long. It felt like everything was finally falling into place.  To be honest, it was quite overwhelming once I had my work permit in hand. In the week after, I received my social security number, opened a bank account, signed my work contract, applied for some other jobs, went to the DMV to get an Oregon ID, and scheduled my Covid vaccine (more on that later). 

Step 6: Green Card Interview – 318 days 
We received our Interview Notice March 11th, and the date is set for April 19th. During this interview, USCIS might go over any and all documents already submitted, question you about them, but most importantly; they ask you for proof of a bona fide marriage. This interview requires both of us to come in with a folder filled with documents, and it’s really up to us to present them with whatever they need and ”pass the test”. Even though I’ve read many stories of green card interviews, I am still nervous, just like I was for the fiancé visa interview. The idea that someone who has no knowledge of your relationship is supposed to make a decision that will determine the rest of your future together is intimidating, to say the least. 
The downside of the interview is that you have to go over all of the already submitted documents again, and bring copies just in case, which takes a lot of time. It also requires another medical exam, which you have to pay a fair amount of money for. 

Within 24 hours of the green card interview you should hear about their decision: approval, denial, or under review. The green card itself doesn’t really grant me more rights compared to having just my work permit, except I will now be eligible for any stimulus checks (in case Biden signs another Covid Relief Bill), and I will have obtained legal resident status in the US. This whole process doesn’t end with the green card, because spouses of US citizens will receive a 2-year conditional green card. After those 2 years, you can file to get your conditions removed, to then receive a 10-year green card. Within that same timeframe, you’ll be able to choose the path of citizenship and naturalize. All of these processes costs more money and time. It is a real commitment I’m making, but it is very important for our future together. 

UPDATE:
I officially became a permanent resident April 19th, we got approved on the spot! I got a temporary I-551 green card stamp in my passport to use until my card comes in the mail. It feels absolutely surreal to finally be a permanent resident, and it hasn’t fully sunken in yet. Here’s a picture to show the relief and excitement when we came out of the USCIS office knowing I was approved.

The entire process from beginning to end (April 16th 2019 till April 19th 2021) will have taken us 2 years and 3 days, or 734 days. 

In the end I can only say that it was worth it, but for everyone who is still in the middle of it: Stay strong and the best of luck. It is a stressful and stringent process that certainly takes an emotional toll on the immigrant and their spouse. Hopefully this blog while help everyone understand a little better what the process entails and what the most challenging things are for people who are going through this. 

 

 

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Things I Learned When I Moved To The USA

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7 Lessons in cultural differences

It has been almost a year since I moved to America and in this blog I would like to write about the things that I have noticed, appreciated and sometimes struggled with. Everyone experiences things in their own way, and I would like to say that even though this is written from a European perspective, I do respect these cultural differences (yet I might not agree with them).

One of the biggest differences that I’ve noticed when I moved here is that a lot of Americans haven’t actually traveled outside of their own country.

As a European I’ve been blessed with a lot of traveling in my childhood and teenage years. I spent almost every summer in France, Germany or Austria, visited a lot of European cities, and even went on a one-week trip to Barcelona in high school. Being exposed to different languages and cultures from a young age is a privilege, helps you understand the value of cultural differences, and teaches you to respect these differences.

I understand that a lot of Americans have not had this privilege, mainly because the USA is HUGE and flights to Europe are not very affordable. Traveling abroad is not encouraged the way it is in Europe. This may have contributed to the individualism that is the very core of American culture. That being said, let’s explore some of the other noticeable differences.

 

 

 

1. the american dream vs reality

I’m pretty sure everyone has heard of the ideology on which the USA was founded, namely ‘The American Dream’. The USA is a real immigrant country, and the ideals of democracy, freedom, equality, and ”hard work will earn you success”, are what got America so far in the first place. It was the country of endless opportunities.  

Without going too much into the whole debate on whether or not the American Dream is still alive, I have experienced first-hand how dreadfully complicated, slow and expensive the immigration process is nowadays. From my other blogs (and if you follow the news) you will also know democracy and equality are currently very much under threat. The work ethic here is ‘live to work’ and not ‘work to live’, which can definitely help you achieve success, but at the same time the disparity gap is getting bigger every day. I’d like to point out these differences because I think the Unites States has changed a lot in the past 5-10 years, which also had an effect on some of the core values American society was built on. Before you pack your bags and want to start a new life in one of the most powerful nations in the world – know what you’re getting yourself into!

2. immigration is really really hard

Who hasn’t heard of the show ”90-day fiancé” and its many spin-offs? Even I had to deal with people saying that my situation was ‘just like that of the TV program!’ and let me set the record straight: that show is NOT a depiction of real life. Many couples on that show barely know each other before they get engaged, and once they do, immigration is just a breeze. No waiting times, no problems paying a large amount of money, no stress from having someone evaluate your entire relationship and decide your future for you. 

I will write a blog just dedicated to my immigration timeline and experience, but what I can tell you now is that it is not and easy thing to do. At times, it will feel like the world is working against you. It will feel so unfair, needing to have the patience of a saint and a savings account, just to be with the one you love. Once you finally have that visa in hand – it’s just the start of a long and painful immigration procedure that you have absolutely no control over. And it’s like they are setting you up for failure. You will barely have any rights once you are married to your American spouse and will have to wait anywhere from 6 to 12 months to finally be able to establish your life here: to work, to open a bank account, to get a driver’s license. All of that while being locked inside the country (you are not allowed to leave the country until your paperwork is in order). 

We had a strong relationship and  were committed to making it work, but immigration still managed to break me. It’s a lot to deal with, and it puts a lot of pressure on your marriage as well. 

Not to mention I am from The Netherlands, have a Masters degree, and speak several languages. Not everyone gets treated the same way as an immigrant in America, and not everyone is as ‘lucky’ as I am. 

3. The american hospitality 

Whereas in The Netherlands, inviting someone to your home is kind of a big deal, in America you can almost just walk right into someone’s house. Their fridge is your fridge; suit yourself! Their idea of ‘hosting’ is a lot more casual and laid-back than it is in The Netherlands. The house doesn’t need to be tidy and cleaned up, and a first-time visit is usually not accompanied by a tour of the house. If you are the guest, there aren’t as many expectations you have to meet either. While you can very easily make friends here, the downside is that it’s hard to get past all the small talk, and it will take you a lot of time and effort to really get to know someone. In my experience, a lot of relationships are quite superficial compared to European standards. The kisses (and sometimes the hugs) when you greet or say goodbye to friends are also not done. 

In terms of hospitality, you will notice the ”I am your friend” mentality everywhere: In the supermarket, a bank, restaurants, or even from strangers on the street. Be prepared to be asked the extremely overused ”how are you”, and occasionally questions such as ”how is your day going” and ”what are your plans this weekend”. Not something I would really like to tell the cashier in the local supermarket… But they are just doing their job (and can apparently lose it if they don’t show interests in customers)! 

4. most americans are not very direct

This is very dependent on where you live; East or West Coast. The saying goes that people from the East Coast are cold, rushed, and somewhat rude. People on the West Coast are considered to be warmer and more open-minded. Dutch people are known for being direct, open, and somewhat rude as well, so I think I would fit right in with the East Coasters! I can’t speak for all States or all Americans, but overall a lot of people are really good at beating around the bush. It can take a while before you know what they really mean, as people tend to not get straight to the point. That can be very annoying for Dutch people, since we love just speaking our minds. We grew up in an environment that doesn’t punish you for doing so. You aren’t considered rude if you quickly get to the point and avoid unnecessary small talk. You are also not considered blunt when you are openly speaking about certain taboo topics, such as drugs, racism or sex. Luckily, most Americans that I’ve asked find it ‘refreshing’ to have someone be so direct and open about things.

5. some of the stereotypes are right!

The cars are big, the houses even bigger, and drive-thru’s are EVERYWHERE! Especially now during Covid-times, these drive-thru’s are very convenient. It’s not just for food, there are also ATM drive-thru’s, post office drive thru’s, coffee drive-thru’s.. 

Burgers can be found anywhere. In the couple of blocks around my apartment building, there are already 6 different burger chains. On the plus side, I’ve also had the best burgers of my life in this country!

Groceries are definitely more expensive compared to The Netherlands, but going out for food (and not just fast food) is a lot more affordable. Whereas eating out in The Netherlands is much more of a social happening that you don’t do that often, here in The States it’s a lot more like ‘grabbing a quick bite to eat’. It depends on where you live, but here in Portland, Sport Bars are huge and thus eating out is sometimes accompanied by large tv screens that are very distracting and take away part of the social aspect. 

A non food-related remark I have that’s part of the American stereotype is the many ”I love you’s” that are constantly being exchanged between partners, parents and kids. It usually follows the end of a phone call and replaces a regular ”bye”. Personally, I feel like the phrase loses some of its meaning by being overused. I can’t speak for every Dutch person here, but in my family it isn’t really common to say ‘I love you’ to your family members. It’s kind of a heavy thing to say. 

6. the flag overkill

You literally cannot ever forget where you live, because the second you step outside there will be at least one American flag proudly waving in the wind. I honestly can’t tell you whether this is a patriotic thing or serves some other purpose, but it is definitely fascinating for Europeans to see that many flags out every day. In The Netherlands we actually have a law that determines on what days we can raise the flag, which includes Liberation Day, Kingsday, and (this one seems weird to non-Dutchies) when we graduate high school. Apparently you can get fined when you display the flag on other days, though I’m sure that isn’t really enforced by anyone. 

7. you see armed security guards everywhere – and guns

Also very dependent on where you live in the States, but here in Portland you see armed security guards in every supermarket, bank, mall, gas station, etc. In our case we even see them about every 15 minutes outside our apartment. Sure, I’ve seen security guards in some stores in some big cities in the Netherlands, such as Amsterdam and The Hague, but they’re still not as prevalent as here. You very quickly get used to there always being security guards around, but when you really need them.. they somehow are nowhere to be found. From an outsiders’ perspective, I have to admit that I am unsure whether it makes me feel safe or not. But I guess this goes hand in hand with one major cultural difference: guns here are legal. The exact regulations regarding carrying a weapon are state dependent, but I have seen people with guns. That was very surreal to me!

I hope you enjoyed this blog about some things that I find fascinating about the USA.

Tell me about your own experience in the comments!

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